Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to all! 

I have news once again as it seems like there is always change.  I have accepted a chaplain position at St. Vincent Hospice in Indianapolis IN with a starting date of 1/21. I am very excited about the job, returning to the state I call home, but wondering why I am moving in January!

I have sadness in leaving a beautiful area, warm weather, the gulf, some wonderful friends, and the place that I have learned the most about being a hospice chaplain. My new job is at an inpatient unit which is where my heart is - it is my most favorite part of working at hospice. I will be on staff of St. Vincent Hospital which has many locations and many opportunities. So - it is a perfect job for me and I leave FL with imprints of so many people on my heart.

I, like you, have been saddened by the killings in CT. It has made me think about the kids in my life. I know you have had similar feelings - hug them tight and keep them safe. I am also saddened by the voices that want to be heard - about gun control, about bearing arms, the second amendment, where God was, what caused the shootings. We would all like to have an easy answer that makes sense. There isn't. And the voices that get loud and force people into their own corners fighting will not bring peace nor answers.  

So for this Christmas, I plan to light a candle and believe in a loving God that is also weeping.

October 3, 2012

Greetings to all that read. There was a time that I thought I was up-to-date in technology and I could figure most things out. I don't post here for a couple of months and it is all new! I'll just keep typing and hope that in the end, it will look like a post. Technology has thoroughly surpassed my abilities - and interest.

I'm being a little jealous right now as this is the time of year that I miss Indiana. The cooler weather and the autumn colors are only memories today. So in honor of the memories, I am making pumpkin chocolate chip bread. That should do it!

8 weeks ago, I had knee replacement surgery so I have been in recovery mode. Therapy, exercises, naps, reading, way too much TV, and playing Words with Friends and Sky Words have been my days. I had the other knee replaced 6 years ago and I remember it being easier. Maybe because I am older, maybe my memory is poor, maybe this knee was worse from the start, maybe other reasons but it has been a time to forget!

 So with that, I haven't worked too much - I just started working part-time a couple of weeks ago. I can feel like I can't walk anymore or that I have no energy left, and then, I meet a patient that fills my spirit. I still love what I do. This week I went into a room with a patient that has been in alot of pain. I met her at the hospital and she quickly told me she wanted to go home. I have found in the days of being a chaplain, that most people that say they want to go home to a chaplain means that they are ready for their final home - their eternal home. But - we were in the hospital and I wasn't completely sure, so I asked her about home. Her words were, I'm ready to see God. I hope she gets her wish this week.

I'm putting a link here to the Pink Glove Project - on YouTube. There are other videos so if you like the pink glove project, search for more. I think of the many people I know that fight cancer, have survived and thrived through cancer - I think of my mom who would have been 88 this month, and I love the pink glove project. I can't figure out how to add the link so you most likely will have to copy and paste. But it's fun to watch - even though the whole thing is long. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tv3URNYrRh0

July 28, 2012

Greetings to all that read! It's been awhile since I have put words to this blog but I often think of you and the ways that your spirits are a part of me - even in Florida! I could write so many stories of people I encounter that it seems hard to pick one or two. So today, I'll just share a couple that I encountered this week. I met a man on Monday that has a PhD in Mathematics - whew - he was quite an intelligent man! But what I loved about him was his love for knowledge and being challenged in his thoughts. He grew up Catholic and still found support and comfort in the rituals and liturgy of the Catholic church. But he also loved the Jewish traditions of his long time female partner. They had lived together for 31 years, never marrying as they liked their own arrangement after both being married once. He had learned about her faith tradition and together they incorporated a hers and his faith that gave them joy. One of the many things I love about being an interfaith chaplain is how I have the privilege of learning from so many people about what gives them hope, peace, and a sense of purpose. The second visit was with a Catholic woman who loves her Catholic church. She had written formal prayers, rosaries, and statues everywhere. So on the 1st visit with her, I listened to her describe her faith. Later in the week, she wanted me to come back and so I did. She did not feel well and could not get up from the couch. So I read to her. Her comment was that she thought it would be perfect if she died while I (or someone) was reading to her. Just like a child. She isn't quite ready to die yet, but I hope that I can be reading to her when she does. I hope you can tell that I love what I do. And in these times of killings and violence and shouting all kinds of things that hurt each other in the name of religion and God, I hold on to the fact that my job is to love God and love others. Nothing more. Nothing less.

May 11, 2012

My oh my, it's been a long while. So much has happened in these few months. So I will update a little and I'll share a story or two as I know a few of you enjoy the stories of hospice. I still love what I do - I think that I don't really need to say that anymore. Yes, I still love it - but I have been doing this work long enough that I don't need to affirm my love. It's a given...It's my final answer...it's my call in life to do this work. I have spent time in the home of a patient over the past few weeks. She collected shells and had been collecting them for years. She started when she was a kid and had so many stories of picking up shells on the beach. I think about those shells and how her family will have a tangible memory each time they pick up a shell. I went to see her today, and found that she is imminent and will die soon. I took her a shell - it seemed fitting. I also recently went to be with a family when the mom died. Their Mom, collected angels. As some of you may remember, my mom collected angels too and had them pretty much everywhere! I have kept a few and with each one there is a story. This family was already talking about how to distribute the angels so this tangible memory will be passed to generations - from Florida to Maine to California. On this Mother's Day weekend, I remember my mom. As I say to so many people, there is something about mamma's. My mom was special to me and to many. She had the gift of hospitality and could throw parties and entertain in her home with enthusiasm and with love. My brothers and I fondly remember her words, "let's have a party" when it really meant, let's eat junk food. So I blame my mom for my love of junk food - oh, no, not blame - but remember her each time I am fighting a craving for something sweet. My mom was strong and a survivor. She was a nurturer and caregiver. She enjoyed life and loved her church. She relied on her faith when life got hard. I have had my moments where I thought things were not that good because I was becoming my mother, but to be honest, I am proud to be like my mom. So I remember my mom on this weekend. I really miss her. So call your mother. Or visit your mother. Remember your mother. Honor your mother. Be grateful for your mother. And mother can be the one that gave you birth, the one that raised you, the one that rescued you, the one that loved you, and any combination. Update: We have had friends to visit this year and more to come next week. Visits help me from being so homesick! I love much about Florida and I miss much about Indiana. I am now officially addicted to Words with Friends but have given up, Spider Solitaire. Does it really matter what I am addicted to? Connie and I made a new "rule" that we would try new restaurants when we go out as opposed to always going to our past favorites. I won't say I have new favorites but it's been a good adventure. I was a visitor some at the United Methodist Church General Conference in Tampa. The "church" has two slogans/tag lines, Open Hearts, Open Minds, Open Doors and Making Disciples of Jesus Christ for the Transformation of the World. In my own opinion, I think it fell short on both. And of course, in the same convention center, Tampa will be hosting the Republican Convention. If anyone wonders, I won't be going. Be well, friends.

January 18

Greetings to all that read! As usual, it has been awhile but glad to meet you here today.

I have wanted to share a story with you of a special person named Rickie. I met her at the hospital many times where she would share her own story with me. She had been raised in the Methodist church and as many people do, left the church as a young adult. She was diagnosed with Hepatitis C and Cancer a couple of years ago and needed emotional and spiritual support and went searching. She found a group of pagans that supported her in her journey of illness. She kept sharing her story with me - and I did not know much about paganism, but I was able to listen. She had a friend who she called her soul mate and best friend. Rickie and Tom moved to Florida from Ohio just a couple of years ago to be near the beach! Almost immediately, Rickie was diagnosed and began a slow decline.

Two weeks ago, I was told that Rickie was at the hospital so I was going to go see her. I found out that she had been released so I called Tom to see if I could visit at their home. I don't usually follow-up like that, but I had a whisper in my ear that said, go. So I went. Rickie was terminally restless - first up, then down, then hallucinating. Tom was scared and frustrated and exhausted and when I got there, he began sobbing. It was too much for him but he had told Rickie that she could die at home. Tom had made a promise but did not know how difficult it would be. I immediately called a nurse as help was needed! Tom needed a break and asked if he could take a short walk to a store for cigarettes. Of course I said yes - although I was frightened to be there alone. Rickie had a large body and was very restless so I was afraid that she would fall. Together, Tom and I got her in bed so Tom left for his walk. I tried to not engage Rickie so she might rest until the nurse got there. 5 minutes earlier, Rickie was walking, talking, and drinking water and hallucinating. Tom left...and Rickie dropped the water and died.

I am convinced that Rickie knew that this was her chance to die without Tom there. Experience tells me that some people wait until everyone is there, some people wait until all are gone. Rickie did not want Tom there so physically, Rickie was not ready to die - but it was the only chance.

On January 28, we will be having a pagan service for Rickie at the beach - the place she loved. I have never experienced a pagan service - but for Rickie, I will do just that.

As I write here often, the blessing that I get at working at hospice is the reminder that every day is a gift. It is our tagline, but it is so true. So live life fully, work out your conflicts, say what is important, love big, and find what gives your life meaning - and then love that.

Blessings for your own journey through life.